I am sitting here. Tired. Lethargic. Still not feeling well.
I'm fed up. I've given it a week. I moved out on my room mate a week ago now. Today it's been a week since he found out. He's already been nice and tried to get me back. He's been nasty to me again - actually had me crying again for a while this weekend. Then back to nice.
But I haven't been able to finish what I need to do for me.
And what do I need to do for me?
Finish cleaning the trailer. Not necessarily all of it. But at least the living areas I'll be using. It'll be nice to have a clean, organized living space again.
Running. Get back on track with my marathon training program. I am so far behind right now it's not even funny.
Regain my own sanity
Learn to love time on my own.
Eat for fuel, not for padding
I know. I can't do it all overnight.
I have been cleaning. My bedroom is 80% set up. The kitchen is about 90% done. I still need to touch up some walls, vaccuum, sweep, clean the other bathroom. Not a lot. I have taken a few days off for me, and I don't feel too bad about that. I need some me time too with all these changes. But now it's time to just get 'er done already.
I am slowly learning how to do this for me. It's taking time. It will take more time. I'm okay with that .
As for the fitness/nutrition... Well....
Okay. I have stocked my fridge with good foods. I need more freggies, but I'm getting there. I have to put together a few salads tonight - fruit salads, salads for lunches, etc. Basically prep work. Then stuff is easy peasy to put together.
Running. Well, I actually miss it. Besides, I'll feel better. I actually might sleep again.
I'm just so overwhelmed. According to my schedule, my runs this week are:
1. jog6min, run faster 3min, repeat x7
2. 60min tempo run
3. easy 120min run
It is TERRIFYING me. I don't really know why. I can do the longer runs. I have. Just last month. But it's been so long...
Okay. Time to stop looking at the whole thing. Just focus on today.
What can I do today to wake up feeling like a success tomorrow?
Eat well, and track everything eaten
Run. I don't care if it's only 10minutes, or a full hour. Just run today
Clean up that kitchen. Just finish it already. If you're out of energy, just move the suitcases into the bedroom and leave them for today. But GET THEM OUT OF THE KITCHEN ALREADY.
To knock it out of the park today
do the prep work on at least 2 salads
wash out the fridge, so it doesn't keep weighing on your mind.
burn over 500 calories today
Remember these little guys? How good you felt when they were around?
YOU HAVE IT IN YOU TO GET THERE AGAIN.
THE POWER TO GET THERE IS IN ME. NO WHERE ELSE.
I can do this. Focus.
Today I will:
Track all my food
Drink at least 8 glasses of water
Run for at least 10min. Burn 500 calories - BONUS!!!!!!!!!!!
Clean out the kitchen
That's it. Not much. I'm not asking my body to run a marathon today. I'm not asking it to eat 100% for fuel and no treats at all. I'm asking for a baby step in the right direction.
I CAN DO THIS